Stanislava Romanova

I painted this piece in winter — that same brutal winter without light or heat, with shelling happening every day. I painted it simply to make my existence a little more bearable, to bring some light and joy into those fucking miserable days. I just needed to escape for a while.

And later, I realized that in the middle of that orange circle, I had painted my own “tired” face…

It wasn’t planned. I only noticed the resemblance while blending the paint. And once I confirmed that the muscles on one side of my face were actually tense, I had no doubts anymore — this was definitely my own “tired,” asymmetrical face from the winter of 2025–26.

Inside the sun that was supposedly meant to brighten my life, two halves of a face began to emerge very clearly —

• the reality I was living in — a tired half of a face, dark circles under the eyes, the faintest hint of a smile, no glow;

• and the reality I want to live in — hope, reflected in the other half of the smiling sun.

Symbolic, isn’t it?

Knowing the power my paintings can have, I couldn’t not use it…

I wanted this painting to become my personal manifesto — and, indirectly, to help bring a dramatic chapter of my life to an end.

That’s how I came up with the idea of filling the background with transparent angels against a stormy, anxious sky. They are shooting at each other — I don’t think this part needs much explanation. And if it does, well, I have just shown you war.

But they are so insignificant against the enormous orange sun with its “tired” face that you might think this is a symbolic gesture of victory over circumstances…

But it isn’t.

It is an expression of my desire to leave the war behind, somewhere far away in my memories.

Although that bitch has sunk so fucking deep into my mind over these years…

The rays of the sun became my own personal kolovrat — a symbol of the cyclical nature of life, a reminder that every period eventually comes to an end. Like flames, they erase everything that came before, allowing me to free myself from what has been weighing me down for far too long.

And perhaps, once this chapter is finally over, the face of the sun will look a little less “tired.”